Double vision

As I mentioned before, I´m wearing glasses. Having to work at a computer, I´m legally required to have my eyes checked regularly.
This morning´s checkup went less smoothly than usual, as I had real difficulties focusing on those tiny images they had me look at. Now, according to my optician, the glasses I need haven´t changed, but I did notice that with just a bit of straining my eyes I get those troubles focusing.
Which I guess might have something to do with my weight loss. I have, after all, lost quite a bit of padding in my face, too, so it´s highly probable that I have also lost fat around my eyeballs. I did notice those vision problems every time my weight had gone down by a greater amount, and I know they tend to go away again once my body has readapted to that weight.
Just another reminder of how many things in my body have been influenced by being morbidly obese. Obviously, being obese is something that can wreak all kinds of havoc on all parts of the body. I´m glad to have made it out of there before incurring any more damages.
As to smoking, I´m down to about fifteen from twenty to twenty-five cigarettes a day, half  amount of nicotine than my old brand.
And I have been watching just when the cravings come.
Unsurprisingly, they come whenever I want to take a break, or procrastinate on something.
Now what I need to find out is how to take a break without smoking- or eating instead. Just sitting there, for me, is making me all jittery.
Going out for a smoke is, in contrast, doing something.
Looks like I still need to work on my problem with free time.
I envy people who look forward to days off. Myself, I´m actually glad to be back working, most of the time.
I also envy people who can be relaxed, just enjoying a few minutes off from work, without that urge to be doing something.
If I had that ability, I wouldn´t need to fear quitting that much.
Crazy, isn´t it?


Julia